souvenirs of Hell

"A sum can be put right: but only by going back till you find the error and working it afresh from that point, never by simply going on. Evil can be undone, but it cannot 'develop' into good. Time does not heal it...

If we insist on keeping Hell (or even Earth) we shall not see Heaven: if we accept Heaven we shall not be able to retain even the smallest and most intimate souvenirs of Hell."


絕對同意友人所言，每一個字也有它獨特的顏色與感覺；故縱然意思相近，所預示的氣氛可以迥然不同。有些字，不能輕易說，也不能隨便說。翻開Lewis的〈The Great Divorce〉，原來是一個正邪不兩立的故事；可對我們來說，divorce這詞的重量已蕩然無存，甚至正邪也已經不是George Macdonald所指的那回事：

"No, there is no escape. There is no heaven with a little of hell in it --- no plan to retain this or that of the devil in our hearts or our pockets. Out satan must go, every hair and feather."

也許字義的「轉型」也不盡是悲觀的；捱打地越級挑戰神哲領域的一年間，我發現不少作者在書的起首詳盡地把活潑的新義（或被遺忘了的舊義）注入一些我們慣用的字中，從而迫使我們重新看待一些扭曲了的想法。學期初讓全體同學讀到「反艇」的〈Holy Scripture〉就花了不少篇幅討論revelation, text, community, faithful reception的含意，甚至表明authority of Scripture in the church是如何跟世界上那些可以是反覆無常、專制和不法的(capricious, arbitrary, and unlawful)authority 不能相提並論；又或者，Webster在此正是要為authority的定義來一個「洗底」。


字就是這樣觸碰著我的神經。

今天早上，覺得〈The Great Divorce〉的introduction中"souvenirs of Hell"一詞用得實在好；罪就是這樣，常常掛著一副天真無邪、毫無殺傷力的臉孔，仿如那些無傷大雅的「紀念品」一樣－－until you see their real faces...